Vicky Pattison has said she found it “really painful” to watch back old footage of herself on Geordie Shore.
The 34-year-old rose to fame in her mid-20s on the reality TV show which, from its first series in 2011, became infamous for its bold and brash stars and rowdy, boozy nights out.
She recalled watching the footage as part of Channel 4 documentary titled Vicky Pattison: Alcohol, Dad And Me, in which she explores the medical and psychological sides of alcoholism and talks about growing up with a functioning alcoholic father.
'There's real elements of myself, and who I was then, that I'm really not proud of'Vicky Pattison spoke to #BBCBreakfast about her time on reality TV programme 'Geordie Shore' after her revealing C4 documentary 'My Dad, Alcohol and Me'. pic.twitter.com/LPQwKJAOe4
— BBC Breakfast (@BBCBreakfast) August 3, 2022
Speaking on BBC Breakfast, she said: “Everybody will probably assume they know all there is to know about me – like, 12 years in the industry, I’m hardly what you would call shy, my whole life on Instagram – but this was pivotal, this was different, it wasn’t so much just honest as it was raw, and hard, it was really difficult.”
She added: “People used to watch Geordie Shore and see 100 hours of footage go into 42 minutes of show, and think they had me all figured out, you know, and they were seeing a very small glimpse of us and a version of me that probably doesn’t even really exist anymore, you know?
“So it felt really good to show this side and tell my story and hopefully help people in the process.”
Pattison was arrested in 2013 after throwing a shoe inside a bar, injuring a woman and a member of staff.
She was suspended from Geordie Shore, but returned to the show for two more series and finally quit in 2014.
Asked about watching old footage of herself from all those years ago, she told BBC Breakfast: “There’s a clip in the doc where I actually sit down and watch some bits of Geordie Shore, and I found it really painful – and that’s not just, like, the fashion choices, my behaviour as well.
“I’ve grown up a lot and I do, I think it’s a huge transitional period for anyone between your early 20s to your early 30s, but I did my growing up in the public eye, which forces you to grow up like a lot faster, so, no, there’s real elements of myself and who I was then, or at least who I was becoming, that I’m really not proud of.”
A review from The Guardian gave the programme three stars out of five, saying it was a “deeply personal, very moving untangling of the part booze played in her upbringing”.
It added: “She is an absolute gift of a presenter: commanding, charismatic, beadily intelligent, unfailingly honest and unflaggingly articulate.
“You hope that, off the back of the absolute blinder she plays here, she will be given the opportunity to broaden her reach.”
Pattison won I’m A Celebrity. .. Get Me Out Of Here! in 2015.
– Vicky Pattison: Alcohol, Dad And Me aired on Channel 4 this week and is available on All 4.