Love was in the air, everywhere I looked at Tor-na-Coille in deepest, darkest Royal Deeside, even though Valentine’s Day had just passed when we ventured forth.
There is something romantically appealing about this former Victorian mansion, which cost £1,000 to build. You cannot buy a summer break to Spain for that these days, which reminds us just how the value of money has changed over the decades.
Money was no object to the lovebirds flocking around tonight, still full of Valentine’s Day fever. Both of the restaurants, the grill and the fine dining section, were doing a roaring trade.
This is a grand building just outside Banchory, on the road to Balmoral, and it is little surprise to discover that the hotel has links to royalty from bygone days – European royalty in fact. The building still appears to maintain its original Victorian features, which is very appealing and is apparently very popular with Royal Deeside coach tours in summer.
Comic genius Charlie Chaplin also loved Tor-na-Coille. He could have built a comic short out of my peculiar situation: after a warm welcome, our waitress seemed to forget about the menus or to ask if we would like drinks.
We watched, with growing impatience, as other diners arriving after us were guided to tables, handed menus and offered drinks.
Frustrated, I waddled off to find the menus for myself, but not twirling a walking stick, much to the bemusement of the waiting staff. I am sure Mr Chaplin could have made something out of this raw material.
We could feel the love all around again. I am sure it was bringing the red roses out in the garden, although it was still winter.
My wife and I fall into that killjoy group that feels you do not have to make a special thing of being in love on one special day. We do it all year round – she lovingly tells me when I am snoring and I lovingly tell her when she has forgotten to put out the bins.
Anyway, we were back in the groove after the menu mishap and the staff could not do enough for us. My only complaint was that they never came to ask if we wanted more drinks. I just kept waving my hands.
The menu was full of interesting things and difficult choices.
For starters, my wife chose ham-hock terrine, with chutney and toast, while I went for Arbroath smokey chowder with smoked haddock and scotch egg.
Both were unusual and attractive choices, which we had not seen on menus locally before.
As a loyal devotee of Cullen skink, I eagerly anticipated the chowder. It didn’t let me down: darker than CS, but packed with just as much flavour and depth.
The ham-hock terrine was also excellent and packed with thick shreds of delicious ham.
I kept the fish theme going by opting for sea bass as my main course. It had a different spin than normal, with a puy lentil, chorizo and kale base to sit on. Again, this was a special dish that was just a little different. There were generous fillets of fish, cooked just right, with a crisp skin and soft fleshy fish underneath.
For mains, my wife went for an 8oz fillet steak, cooked medium. This was a thick juicy fillet, packed with rich flavour, and served with tomatoes, mushrooms and home-made fries. As a side order, I asked for onion rings and they were large, fluffy and very tasty.
We rounded off with a zesty lemon tart and raspberry citrus sorbet and sticky toffee pudding and ice cream.
It had been as near as perfect as a night could be. We fell in love with the place, actually.
And, talking of love, there’s a special menu and gift for Mothering Sunday at Tor-na-Coille.
As Mr Chaplin once said: “You need power only when you want to do something harmful, otherwise love is enough to get everything done.”
TOR-NA-COILLE HOTEL
BANCHORY, ROYAL DEESIDE. PHONE 01330 822242.
1 TERRINE £6.50
1 ARBROATH CHOWDER £4.95
1 FILLET STEAK £28
1 SAUCES £2
1 SEA BASS £16
1 SIDE ORDERS £3
1 PANNA COTTA £6.50
1 LEMON TART £6.50
2 PROSECCO £13
1 MIXER £1.70
1 SOFT DRINK £1.90
1 DASH CORDIAL £0.50
TOTAL £90.55
GRACE LEFT £5
TOTAL £95.55