We hear that “fly and scare” missions are launching to protect people in the north-east from attacks by aerial intruders.
Don’t worry – it’s not because Russian military aircraft are testing out British air space again, but the annual menace from gulls.
But the storm clouds are gathering for aggressive breeding gulls in Peterhead, where the problem is particularly acute, in the shape of Storm, a patrolling Harris Hawk.
Storm is licensed to kill – or at least scare off the really anti-social scavenging gulls, which harass shoppers around the busiest town centre streets.
These wild creatures have to live, too, of course, but being repeatedly dive-bombed by a big heavy-weight herring gull can be scary if you’re not expecting it.
Storm, the winged crusader, will allow Peterhead folk to sleep easy in their beds at night, protected from villainous gulls – except they won’t, because they will lie awake listening to their screeching racket all night long.
Does Storm have night-vision goggles?
Seriously, though, we only have ourselves to blame – because we carelessly leave enough food waste lying around the streets to make our roofs attractive nesting places.