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Cancer reunites best friends from Fraserburgh after 40 years apart

Pamela and Brenda met at Fraserburgh Academy 40 years ago. Photo by  Duncan Brown
Pamela and Brenda met at Fraserburgh Academy 40 years ago. Photo by Duncan Brown

Their friendship began in high school, and now Brenda Whyte and Pamela Cardno are reunited and supporting one another in ways they could never have imagined.

When the two pals left Fraserburgh Academy, grown-up life intervened and over time they went their separate ways.

That was until almost 40 years later when they were brought back together by the unlikeliest of circumstances.

In May last year, the pair – both now 52 – were both diagnosed with non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma.

And when the news of one another’s illness came to light through a family tie, the two old chums decided it was finally time for a catch-up.

“We were diagnosed with the same cancer just six days apart and we discovered the news about each other through a shared relative,” explains Pamela, whose dad sadly died just weeks before her own diagnosis.

“We first met again at an event organised by Maggie’s in Aberdeen and when we saw each other we just hugged and burst out crying.”

With Pamela in Fraserburgh and Brenda in nearby Fetterangus, the friends now meet up for coffees and lunches when they can and have realised how closely in parallel their lives have run.

During the decades when they were not in touch, they both trained as health carers and went on to marry and have children.

And despite their years apart, they talk together as if they had never been estranged, often finishing the other’s sentences.

Brenda said: “It was quite fine being able to phone Pamela to see if she had been feeling what I had, it was good to know someone else was going through the same thing.”

When the side-effects of chemotherapy began to take their toll, the friends dealt with it very differently.

Brenda’s mum took the shears to her blonde tresses the moment the first clump fell out, while Pamela was devastated at the thought of losing her long, dark hair and held out for as long as possible before asking her husband John to shave it off.

However, through it all, the chums have benefited hugely from having someone to lean on during the anxious moments between treatment sessions, scans and test results.

And now they are supporting one another in a different way as they prepare to take to the stage for Courage on the Catwalk.

Brenda said: “There were times I just didn’t even want to leave the house because I felt so miserable.

“I had a friend’s wedding last year that I didn’t enjoy the way I would have had I been well.

“Even travelling to Aberdeen for rehearsals for the show has been really tiring.

“After the catwalk we’ll have a spa day to treat ourselves as it has just been so busy.”

Both say they could not have coped without the support of their family and friends.

Brenda especially thanks her mum, who was her rock throughout everything, and Pamela has found strength in her faith as a Christian, as well as her husband, her children and grandchildren.

But having someone to turn to who knows exactly how it feels to fight this battle has been a priceless gift.

“Like I said to my husband, there’s not many people who have a friend to go through this with,” said Pamela.