David Mead hopes his own mental health struggles can be used to help other men facing similar issues.
The 45-year-old is open about experiencing depression and suicidal thoughts and wants to put his life lessons to good use.
He has set up a new group in Inverness to help tackle a growing problem of mental ill health among men.
Fortnightly meetings held in the Cameron Youth Centre are the first in Scotland organised by an organisation called Man Down.
‘If I weren’t here it might be better’
Originally from Suffolk, David moved to Fort Augustus in 2010 with his family.
They later relocated to Cornwall – but a stressful family situation exacerbated ill health for David and prompted him to start attending Man Down meetings.
David and his wife now live in Aviemore.
He said events surrounding the move led to him going on a “spiral of depression and self-isolation”.
“My wife noticed I wasn’t well and said I needed to see the doctor.
“I blurted out everything and I was put in contact with the hospital and then Man Down.”
He added: “It got to the point where I felt I had failed my family.
“I felt that if I weren’t here it might be better. But ending my life would have made everything worse and everyone else would have had to deal with it.
Man Down groups encourage men to speak using the ‘offload’ ball“Gradually it got better by talking about it and being able to let it out.
“And once I started talking at Man Down I was able to open up more to my wife and found she was suffering from depression too, so I wanted to be there for her.”
The group, which has the motto Let’s Talk About It, is run entirely by volunteers.
During meetings, those attending are passed a rugby ball, known as an ‘offload ball’, when they can talk about their problems if they want.
David has had a Scottish version of the ball created for the Inverness meetings which are attracting increasing numbers.
After no one turned up at the first event, around a dozen men of varying ages have come to subsequent gatherings.
Volunteers needed to man support groups
They have spoken about a range of issues, including depression and other health issues as well as money, family or work problems or the loss of a loved one.
“The first step through the door is the hardest”, said David. “But it is a peer-support, non-judgemental meeting.
“There is no need to book, you can just walk up and we will listen if you wish to talk.
“There are other groups in the area dealing with mental health issues but we are still needed, the more help out there the better.”
David and Man Down are looking to recruit volunteers for the Inverness group and others they hope to start up.
He says his own health is helped knowing he is trying to help others.
“I’ve learned a lot of things and have a lot of experience to offer.
“If I can pass that to someone else it’s a bonus. I like to think I’m making a difference.
“People have come back and said they felt a weight was lifted off their shoulders by just talking.
“And I get a fuzzy heart knowing I’ve said something to someone that has helped them.
“That’s what I get out of it.”
Man Down aims to have 200 groups around the country by 2026, including more in the Highlands.
For more Inverness news and updates visit our dedicated page and join our local Facebook group.
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