Dad-of-two Kev Clarke from Bridge of Don was just 37 when he became one of many to die during the pandemic, with ‘Covid’ written on his death certificate.
But behind every statistic is a story of love and loss, and sanitised grief amid pandemic restrictions.
Today – on what would have been his 41st birthday – his family has spoken of a man with a heart of gold, “the best daddy” and a soul mate whose loss is still painfully felt each day.
‘Wee angel’ Kevin, always loved being around people
Kevin Lee Clarke was born on April 7 1984 in Aberdeen Royal Infirmary.
First son of police constable Charlie Clarke and his wife Maureen from Bridge of Don, he arrived after a 17-hour labour.
Mothercare worker Maureen was only too happy to endure that, however, because it meant finally getting to meet her “7lb plus” much longed-for baby boy.
A “wee angel” as a baby, Maureen describes Kevin – later known as Kev by friends – as a good kid, never any bother.
“Even when his little brother Paul came along, and he wasn’t quite three then, he was so good with him.
“Kevin was always the one who wanted to socialise and make friends with everyone. If we were ever on holiday he would be the one to join the kids’ clubs. Paul was more reserved.”
‘In primary school, we nearly lost him,’ said mum Maureen
Kev was in the first cohort of children to be enrolled at Scotstown Nursery. He later attended Upper Westfield Primary School.
A happy lad, in his last year of primary school he developed a serious illness.
“We thought we would lose him,” Maureen explained. “It was an awful time.”
From a simple cough Kev began complaining that he couldn’t catch his breath.
A visit to the GP resulted in a diagnosis of croup. Maureen was advised to “steam him” but he kept feeling a need to go outside to the garden for fresh air.
“I was at work one day when Charlie phoned me. He said Kev’s not great, his lips are turning blue.
“I came home and we called an ambulance. They had to do a tracheotomy in the house.”
‘We always felt lucky to have Kevin in our lives’
With his breathing established Kev was transferred to the children’s hospital but was quickly admitted to intensive care. He was diagnosed with bacterial tracheitis and pneumonia.
He eventually pulled through and returned to the children’s ward before coming home.
“It really was awful. We felt very lucky he came through that.”
Kev moved on to Bridge of Don Academy where he was a popular pupil.
“He was one of those kids who never needed to study much,” said 70-year-old Charlie.
“We went on holiday once and he just knew how to speak German to one of the families. I didn’t even know he had been taught that – and I never saw him studying it. He just picked things up.”
‘Big kid’ Kev loved his job and his role at Fubar
Desperate to leave school to start earning a wage, Kev secured an apprenticeship with Richard Irvine. Working as a trainee electrician, he was happy and healthy.
After serving his time at Irvine’s he worked for another Bridge of Don firm before changing careers to work offshore.
“He became an ROV pilot – operating remote submarines – and just loved it,” said Maureen.
When he was at home Kev also served as an admin for Fubar News and in his spare time loved to play computer games.
“He was such a big kid at heart,” added Maureen. “He was lovely.”
Bravery award for fire heroes Russell Shum and Kev Clarke
On Hogmanay 2015 Kev’s friend Russell Shum was walking his dog on Balgownie Drive near to Kev’s house, when he spotted a home on fire.
He dialled 999, and then called Kev to help.
The two friends tried to break down the door and managed to break through one of the corners, before shoulder-barging their way through.
They were hit with a wall of smoke and extreme heat.
Kev discovered 75-year-old Meg Hadden in her bedroom.
Overwhelmed by smoke he couldn’t get to her. As he ran outside to catch his breath firefighters arrived.
Mrs Hadden was rescued and taken to hospital but tragically died eight hours later.
Both Russell and Kev received Scottish Government Braveheart awards for their courage.
It remained a source of great pride for Kev that he had been able to help. In a news report from the time he said he wouldn’t think twice in doing it again.
‘I knew he was for me right away,’ said Bex
In 2016, Kev met Bex Symmers from Portlethen.
“I was working in a tattoo studio and Kev came in to collect vouchers for a giveaway that Fubar was running,” said Bex.
“Yeah, I liked him right away.
“We took our time though, as he was just leaving a relationship.”
Maureen (67) said: “All we knew was that he met someone but they were just friends.
“It wasn’t until Paul was getting married that we met Bex, when he asked if he could bring her to Paul’s big day.
“I was nervous because he had just left a difficult situation but Becky is a lovely girl. They were very well suited.”
She said yes… and then the boys came along
Wooing Bex with flowers – and then a rescue cat from Mrs Murrays – they became a couple and quickly began building a life together.
“Kev never did anything by halves, or slowly,” laughed Maureen.
Bex – now 36 – moved into his Bridge of Don home, and during a holiday to their favourite place – Puerto del Carmen in Lanzarote, Kev asked her to marry him.
“We were just so happy,” Bex said. “We started a family really quickly.”
Their first baby boy, Westen, was born in November 2019 and their second son, Raylan, came along almost exactly a year later during the pandemic.
But just one month after they celebrated the boys’ joint first and second birthdays tragedy struck the young family.
Tragedy struck soon after boys’ birthday party
“We both started feeling unwell. We had coughs and were exhausted. I asked Kev’s mum if she could help with the kids because we were so wiped out,” Bex explained.
“He went to the doctor who said it was a chest infection,” Maureen added. “He started antibiotics and it looked like he was turning a corner. But then on the Saturday he rung me to say he fell asleep and felt like he had died. I was worried until he rang the next day feeling a bit better.”
But by 3pm that day, November 29 2020, Bex had to call her in-laws to say Kev wanted her to call an ambulance.
They were told to expect a wait of several hours so Charlie and Maureen offered to drive Kev to the ARI instead.
As Bex helped him into the car she didn’t know it would be the last time she would see “the love of her life” again.
Kev tested positive for Covid
At the hospital, pandemic restrictions stopped Maureen from going inside.
Charlie accompanied his son, begging staff for help. “His lips were going blue in front of me,” said Charlie. “And his oxygen was down to 45%”.
It quickly became clear that Kev had Covid. The entire family were then tested.
Bex, both boys and Maureen also tested positive.
While Kev was in hospital, Bex’ symptoms worsened too.
Maureen had both boys at her house while Bex stayed in quarantine, recovering at home.
When he was up to it Kev Facetimed his family.
‘They called to say he was going on a ventilator’
On December 6 Kev called Becky, then his mum, where he also spoke to his boys.
“He looked a bit better. He even called me back shortly after about flights for our family holiday. I remember saying to him, don’t worry about that now, we’ll sort it when you get home – which we thought might be soon,” said Maureen.
Later that evening Kev sent a text message.
It said “if all goes well I’ll be monitored and can be moved to a normal ward tomorrow”.
But hours later, at 12.45am, the hospital rang. Kevin’s breathing had deteriorated. They were putting him on a ventilator.
“Charlie and I decided we would call Bex in the morning once we knew he had stabilised,” said Maureen.
But at 12.58am the phone rang again.
“Kevin’s heart had stopped,” said Charlie. “I went right up there.”
‘I knew he had gone,’ said mum Maureen
With Covid restrictions still in place, Bex immediately rushed to be with Maureen and the boys.
“I was tracking Charlie on my phone. I could see him getting to the hospital. Not long after I could see that he was coming home,” said Maureen.
“When he walked back in I just said ‘he’s gone, is he?'”
Kev died on December 7 2020. His cause of death was recorded as pulmonary embolism and Covid.
“I was in the police for years,” said Charlie. “I’m trained not to react. But my God, I miss my boy.”
‘This will never seem real, we miss Kev so much’
Today, as the family pay tribute to Kevin on his birthday, while they are grateful they could have a “decent” funeral there’s still no sense of closure.
“When I put Kev in the car… that’s when I last touched him. That’s when I last properly looked in his eyes,” said Bex.
“I still don’t have closure,” said Maureen. “It’s really hard to accept, even now, that he’s gone. I don’t know if I’ll ever get over it.
“Our son Paul was amazing. He organised everything. And I know we were lucky to be able to give Kev had a wonderful send-off. So many other families never got that. But it’s still not real,” added Maureen.
“He had a heart of gold, did Kev,” said Charlie.
“He was the male version of me,” Bex added. “My soul mate, and the best daddy to our boys.”
‘Our hearts are broken but we’ll never forget our Kev,’ say Clarke family
In the three-and-a-half years since Kevin’s death, the family have rallied together to keep his memory alive for his boys.
Though Kev and Bex never made it to their wedding, she legally changed her surname to Clarke last year.
“I’m still his widow,” she said. “I told him I would be his forever, so it seemed like the right thing to do.”
Charlie and Maureen see the boys every day, helping Bex juggle childcare.
“My heart is still broken. At Westen’s first sports day I ran in the dad’s race,” said Maureen.
“I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to make up for Kev not being here.”
- To share your Covid memorial story email lindsay.bruce@pressandjournal.co.uk
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