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Colin Stewart: Do your homework about HIV and don’t make assumptions

You can't tell anything about someone's HIV status without asking them (Photo: Lordn/Shutterstock)
You can't tell anything about someone's HIV status without asking them (Photo: Lordn/Shutterstock)

Would you date someone who is HIV positive? If your answer is no, you need to read this.

Even today, people living with HIV are discriminated against because of their status when there is no need. HIV is no longer the death sentence it used to be, and it doesn’t only affect gay men. It is a manageable condition that can affect anyone.

Guest Columnist, Colin Stewart, talking about how do you get HIV: "If someone tells you they are HIV-positive, don’t dismiss them straight away - have the conversation and find out if they are undetectable."

The graph below shows how people diagnosed with HIV in Grampian became infected. You might be surprised to see that there are 194 patients who are men who have sex with men (MSM), and 197 who have become infected by having heterosexual sex (men with women).

So, if you are sexually active, make sure you know your own status by getting tested.

If you are diagnosed with HIV, you will be started on medication, which is usually just one tablet a day, to protect your immune system. When the level of virus in your blood (your viral load) is undetectable for six months, you can no longer transmit the virus.

If someone tells you they are HIV-positive, don’t dismiss them straight away – have the conversation and find out if they are undetectable.

People don’t know as much about HIV as they think

As an HIV-positive, gay man, I am very open about my status, and I share it with potential sexual partners.

I have been rejected several times after disclosing that I am HIV-positive, even though I have had an undetectable viral load for several years, so cannot transmit the virus. Yet, before I disclosed my status, these men would happily have had sex with me. Where is the logic in that?

For each of the following statements, would you respond: true, false or don’t know?

  • There is a pill you can take that prevents HIV infection.
  • Someone taking treatment who has an undetectable amount of the HIV virus in their body cannot pass on HIV to their sexual partners.

In a recent survey, 90% of those asked said they had average, good or very good knowledge about HIV, how it is passed on, and how to prevent it. Yet, when shown the above statements, only 17% of respondents for the first question and 19% for the second said they were true – the rest said false or don’t know. To clarify, both statements are absolutely true.

A person diagnosed with HIV, on medication, with an undetectable viral load for six months is one of the least risky sexual partners you could have. They cannot pass on the virus. This is known as U=U, or Undetectable = Untransmittable.

So, what is your answer to my first question now?


Colin Stewart is the secretary and co-founder of Our Positive Voice Grampian.

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