It’s hard not to get wrapped up in the sticky side of planning for Christmas, but presents aren’t the be-all and end-all, writes SJ Molver.
No longer do I get caught up in the inevitable end of year postal delays, nor do I queue for hours in horribly hot and overly bright department stores.
And, I don’t spend my festive evenings sifting through millions of items in my Amazon basket that I’ve “saved for later” anymore either. I’ve stopped panic-buying yoga balls, pressure cookers, or sausage dog-shaped draft excluders in the last few days before Christmas.
I am calm, and perhaps a little smug, as my friends accuse me of being far too organised.
When a work colleague or friend mentions Christmas in October, you think they’re mad as a sack of ferrets. You belly-laugh heartily, casually dismissing them, and you carry on your merry little way.
Then, BAM, it’s December 23, and the only gift-related item you have to your name is half a roll of sticky tape, and even that’s mocking you. No matter how much you pick at it, you simply cannot locate the end.
So, you find yourself in the queue at the local hardware store, because it’s the quietest shop in town. You cast your eyes over the mops, feeling that would be scraping the barrel. Then, you remember the kettle at home is on its last boil, and you figure you can kill two birds here.
No more Christmas kettles or shredders
This is how I ended up with a kettle for Christmas one year. It was grey and horrible, and purchased by my husband on Christmas Eve, at the shop round the corner.
It must have been a busy, last-minute kind of year for us both, because I bought him a paper shredder. You can imagine the excitement in our house on Christmas Day. But, at least I can say we still have that shredder. The ugly kettle gave up after about six months.
I vowed then never to leave it until the last minute again, and, now, I’m usually done and wrapped up by about the first week in November, save for a few little stocking fillers and impulse purchases.
This year, all I really want to do is drink, eat, listen to the King’s speech, and fall asleep by five. I’ll be shattered from being up at 4am, because the dog needed out and the kids wanted to “see if Santa’s been”.
It’s hard not to get wrapped up in the sticky side of planning
I do love Christmas. I love keeping the magic alive for our children, and carving out new, slightly bizarre traditions as a family. But, it’s hard not to get wrapped up in the sticky side of planning. So, if you do end up with a kettle and give a shredder, don’t worry – we’ve all been there.
SJ Molver is an author and painter based in the north-east of Scotland
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