We have been told to have a merry little Christmas – with the emphasis on little. Many more of us will be alone this Christmas and will depend upon modern communication tools to stay sane.
This is where I feel I have something to offer, not because I’m a communications specialist, but because I spent Christmas alone once and it was the most miserable day of my life.
I was working as a journalist and scheduled to work both Christmas Eve and Boxing Day. There wasn’t enough time to drive the four hour journey to my folks and back again and I decided I was completely relaxed about the idea of Christmas Day alone. The big day arrived and from dawn till dusk I was bombarded with messages on TV and radio about other families having fun together.
By lunchtime I was sobbing into my ready meal.
Thankfully that was 20 years ago and it is now much easier to stay connected and entertained, so here’s my guide to having a merry little Christmas in eight easy steps:
1. Plan your day with military precision. You have 16 hours to fill.
2. Don’t torture yourself by scrolling through endless images of your friends having the ‘best Christmas ever’ on social media. If they are on social media they are, by definition, staring at their screens. They are not the life and soul of the party, whatever the picture suggests. The people who are having a really good time are not hunched over screens.
3. Notwithstanding point 2 above, social media is not your enemy. There’s something for everyone. Pinterest and Instagram are full of inspirational pictures for almost any hobby. Gardening, clothes, home improvements…even cabins in the woods. Check out Linked In to find old work colleagues, career advice and maybe a new job too. If you’re not on Facebook yet don’t bother, that ship has sailed. Instead download Tik Tok. If you’re over 15 you won’t understand it, but it’s strangely absorbing and before you know it you’ll be wondering where the last hour of your life just went.
4. Multitask. Don’t just watch a movie – keep your mind occupied by doing something at the same time. Retro crafts like knitting, crochet and colouring have had a comeback but my recommendation is a jigsaw. I have friends who went on holiday in the Hebrides and were late for the only activity they’d arranged for the entire week because they were doing a jigsaw.
5. Go for a walk in a park or the countryside. There is plenty of evidence that being somewhere green lifts your mood. You might want to borrow a dog to look less suspicious and I’m sure your dog owning neighbours will be grateful for the offer. So will the dog. Just don’t go anywhere remote or icy. You don’t want to be the one who ruins Christmas for the mountain rescue team.
6. Plan some real contact via a phone call or video call. Open presents with others via video link. Technology makes this easier than ever and the benefit is that you can hide your disdain when other people’s kids are brats, especially if you arrange the screen deliberately badly so that you are out of shot when you lean back. This means you can also top up your glass at will.
7. Get recommendations for box sets and TV series to watch, ideally by posting a request on social media. The resulting list will last you right through to Easter. What, you haven’t got Netflix? Get Netflix!
8. Don’t do anything rash like getting dressed. If you can’t spend all day in your PJs when you’re on your own, when can you? If you decide to do activity number 5, just stick your jeans on over the top. If you are planning activity number 6, just turn down the lights and position a candle close by. You will be bathed in a flattering golden Christmassy glow.
Remember you are not alone. It won’t be a particularly memorable Christmas, but it won’t be too bad. Next year it will all be back to normal and you can race around the country, get drunk and argue with the relatives again.
Eleanor Bradford is a former BBC Scotland Health Correspondent and now works in communications in the education sector