My voyage of discovery in the days of lockdown continues – and I’m happy to share my top tips.
To whit, if you are going to wear a face-covering before going into a shop, don’t eat a bag of McCoy’s Cheese and Onion crisps first.
This became obvious within seconds of puling my Buff scarf up over my mouth and nose while hunter gathering in the local supermarket last week.
Also, don’t be surprised when you approach the checkout and the person ready to serve you goes all wide-eyed. Remember with your face covered you look like an robber and he’s got a till full of cash beside him.
It doesn’t help if your Buff has a Darth Vader design on it.
Also, spare a thought for the police. As I left the till, there was a PC who had just bought her lunch.
I joked “normally you would stop me for looking like this in a shop, now you’d have to stop me if I didn’t”.
Her smile said it all… roughly along the lines of “aye, very good, now off you trot”.
Which I was happy to do. Mainly because my next discovery was there’s only a finite time you can stand your own crisp breath.
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Scott Begbie: Face-covering and crisps? Just don’t