Calendar An icon of a desk calendar. Cancel An icon of a circle with a diagonal line across. Caret An icon of a block arrow pointing to the right. Email An icon of a paper envelope. Facebook An icon of the Facebook "f" mark. Google An icon of the Google "G" mark. Linked In An icon of the Linked In "in" mark. Logout An icon representing logout. Profile An icon that resembles human head and shoulders. Telephone An icon of a traditional telephone receiver. Tick An icon of a tick mark. Is Public An icon of a human eye and eyelashes. Is Not Public An icon of a human eye and eyelashes with a diagonal line through it. Pause Icon A two-lined pause icon for stopping interactions. Quote Mark A opening quote mark. Quote Mark A closing quote mark. Arrow An icon of an arrow. Folder An icon of a paper folder. Breaking An icon of an exclamation mark on a circular background. Camera An icon of a digital camera. Caret An icon of a caret arrow. Clock An icon of a clock face. Close An icon of the an X shape. Close Icon An icon used to represent where to interact to collapse or dismiss a component Comment An icon of a speech bubble. Comments An icon of a speech bubble, denoting user comments. Comments An icon of a speech bubble, denoting user comments. Ellipsis An icon of 3 horizontal dots. Envelope An icon of a paper envelope. Facebook An icon of a facebook f logo. Camera An icon of a digital camera. Home An icon of a house. Instagram An icon of the Instagram logo. LinkedIn An icon of the LinkedIn logo. Magnifying Glass An icon of a magnifying glass. Search Icon A magnifying glass icon that is used to represent the function of searching. Menu An icon of 3 horizontal lines. Hamburger Menu Icon An icon used to represent a collapsed menu. Next An icon of an arrow pointing to the right. Notice An explanation mark centred inside a circle. Previous An icon of an arrow pointing to the left. Rating An icon of a star. Tag An icon of a tag. Twitter An icon of the Twitter logo. Video Camera An icon of a video camera shape. Speech Bubble Icon A icon displaying a speech bubble WhatsApp An icon of the WhatsApp logo. Information An icon of an information logo. Plus A mathematical 'plus' symbol. Duration An icon indicating Time. Success Tick An icon of a green tick. Success Tick Timeout An icon of a greyed out success tick. Loading Spinner An icon of a loading spinner. Facebook Messenger An icon of the facebook messenger app logo. Facebook An icon of a facebook f logo. Facebook Messenger An icon of the Twitter app logo. LinkedIn An icon of the LinkedIn logo. WhatsApp Messenger An icon of the Whatsapp messenger app logo. Email An icon of an mail envelope. Copy link A decentered black square over a white square.

Neil Drysdale: Christmas has never been very festive or fun for shop workers

Even when you're festively stressed, remember shop assistants are trying their best and not being paid very much for their pains.

Times may change, but retail work during the festive period is as busy and stressful as ever
Times may change, but retail work during the festive period is as busy and stressful as ever

I glanced at the young lad as he loitered around the food hall in the BHS department store on Oxford Street and thought: “Here we go.”

One moment, he was tucking a cooked chicken and a bottle of cheap plonk into the large pocket of his oversized coat; the next, he was walking briskly out of the door and moving at pace. A member of the management rushed towards me and shouted: “Go on, get after him!” and gestured to another staff member to follow suit.

Within seconds, both of us were in pursuit of the shoplifter, and dashing towards Tottenham Court Road. Eventually, we cornered the young man and asked him to come back to the shop – at which point, he produced a knife and all bets were off.

I still look back on that incident shortly before Christmas in 1985, and wonder why on earth we were ever placed in such a position. The cost of the goods could hardly have been £10, but we were expected to risk life and limb, and embark on these chases on a regular basis.

Where were the security guards? Answer being that there weren’t any. It was the lot of the hapless retail assistants to take abuse from customers, inside and outside the store, and the Christmas period was always the worst time of the year.

Quite apart from employees having their ears assaulted by the likes of Wizzard’s I Wish It Could Be Christmas Everyday, Mud’s Lonely this Christmas and Slade’s still popular Merry Xmas Everybody on a tape loop (which ensured we heard them five or six times a day from the middle of November onwards), there were the customers to contend with.

‘Three million unemployed – and YOU have a job’

Some of the men were merely confused or embarrassed about going near the perfume or underwear counters. But it’s difficult to respond to the inquiry: “Do you think she’ll like this?” when you have never met the woman in your life.

In one case, an elderly chap asked what lingerie was, even as water began dripping from the bottom of his trousers. No, it wasn’t the call of nature, but a melting packet of lasagne, which he had pocketed for his supper and was thawing under our noses. Why on earth did he stop for a chat?

Santa Claus gets ready for a busy time at Frasers department store on Aberdeen’s Union Street in November 1979

But he was pretty harmless. Worse by far were the rude and surly patrons who had experienced a bad day at the office and were determined to make somebody else pay.

The haughty woman with a receipt and a half-empty bottle of perfume – “I just couldn’t bring myself to like this” – who demanded a refund. The impatient businessman with a sandwich who couldn’t understand that the till was broken and hissed: “Three million unemployed – and YOU have a job.”

And the last-minute festive shopper who wanted a popular product on December 24 and refused to believe it was sold out. “You must have one upstairs.” “Sorry, sir, we don’t.” “Well, can you go and check? Or I’ll take this further.”

Make an effort to be kind

It wasn’t all negative interaction with the public. One afternoon, with the aisles packed, a shopper asked if I could find her some mince pies with brandy butter.

There were none on the shelves, so I headed up to the stock room, waded through what seemed like endless piles of Yuletide merchandise, and eventually tracked down the items. However, by the time I returned downstairs, she looked at me sweetly and said: “I’m very sorry, son, I think I’ll just stick with the plain ones.”

There was a pause for me to catch my breath. “But, here you are – and have a nice Christmas.” At which point, she slipped £10 into my hand and brushed off any attempt to return it.

Remember that shop assistants are trying their best and not being paid very much for their pains

This was in the 1980s, and most of us were simply grateful that we were in work. Fast-forward 40 years, and there’s an epidemic of shoplifting, much of it carried out by organised gangs, while an increasing number of stores have more self-service tills than actual human employees, and customers who are quick to complain if the robotic devices are out of commission.

So, please, whatever stresses you might be undergoing, and regardless of the problems you may have in your own life, remember that shop assistants are trying their best and not being paid very much for their pains. The least they deserve is a smile and a thank you.

And a break from Noddy Holder and Roy Wood, as soon as possible!


Neil Drysdale writes features for DC Thomson and is also an author

Conversation